Splish, splash

Simon's becoming my little water baby.
He likes his baths (finally).
He likes the pool.
He likes to sip water from my cup.

Glorious sleep

I love sleep!
If I could, I'd sleep 10 hours a night and have a nap in the afternoon.
Instead, I am celebrating that my son
has recently re-discovered the perfect night sleep.
He goes down before 8 pm.
He has a meal around 3-4 am.
He fusses and is ignored around 5:30 am.
He wakes up and starts his day around 7 am.
We're all happier.
We all smile more.

To many moms of little ones, this sounds completely normal.
After the month and a half we've had post surgery, I call this heaven.
I've been having dreams again.
I have missed those.
Thank-you Simon, my castless wonder!

M.I.A.

5 nights
5 days
Winnipeg has stolen my husband
it's a work conference
still,
I miss him

(good thing Simon started sleeping better
sans casts)

Happy feet!

Little casts,
perfect little feet.
We're happy to be done this part Simon's life.
Just imagine... only 4 1/2 months to
correct his club feet.
Watch this clip in order to understand
just how fortunate we are to live
in Canada during this time period!

YEAH!!!

My boy is cast-free!
His little feet are swollen and tender but straight!
We couldn't be happier.
(He's already had a shower with Daddy... we're excited for a whole lot of
cool new experiences for our little man!)

The countdown is on!!!!

We're so excited for you, Simon!

Ode to Abbey

My family had to put Abbey the cat down yesterday.
She was 16 years old.
When she was a kitten, she'd sleep in my bed if my parents didn't know.
She'd curl up on my lap while I studied and wrote essays in French.
She loved having her tail pulled.
She was the best mouser.
In her later years, my Dad was her person.
I can't imagine the farm without her scratchy meow.
We'll miss you Miss Abbey-Cat.

Hiatus

For 26 years, I have spent at least one fall night in the throes of first day of school fears. Seven years teaching and I still couldn't shake stage fright. I would be up all night, mind racing, going over every little detail.
Last night, I didn't have stage fright. (Instead I had a baby who managed two 4 hour stretches). Last night, the only thing I worried about was my one little sweetie.
This year, my curriculum will involve Language Arts (LOTS of Eric Carle and Sandra Boyton as well as some Baby signing), Phys. Ed. (Jolly Jumpering, walks, carrying my little sack of potatoes), Social (this baby's going to get regular History and Psych lessons), Home Ec, etc. I just have one pretty awesome student and he's definitely Teacher's Pet.

Best of luck to all my teacher friends out there. Today's a rough one but, you'll do fine!

Labour Day Classic

Go Riders Go!

Running on Empty

What's the best way to clean your fridge?
Have it die... then get a new one.

Nothing like a shiny new appliance to make me smile.

Simon's still having bad nights. We're beginning to run out of steam. Some nights, he gets up just 3 or 4 times and Trevor and I do a little dance in the morning. We think we're getting somewhere and then, there are nights like last night where I spent more time in Simon's room then mine.
We went to the pediatrician. He advised us to drug Simon. We gave him his allotted dose of Baby Advil and he went down without a fight... only to fuss an hour later... and the hour after that and so on and so forth. Not only did we lack sleep, we also felt guilty about drugging our kid.
It's like he has a faulty transmission and can't shift sleep cycles without us. We've tried all the tricks.
Can we hire the supernanny to come and fix our baby?

Terminal

The bread wasn't frozen when I went to make toast. That was the first clue. The celery is limp. Clue #2. Oh... something's wrong with our fridge.
I'm no mechanic and neither is my sweet man so, I called the Fridge Doctor. He had the best ad in the Yellow pages and sounded really nice on the phone. He came last night.
"It's terminal. I've done all I can. Your fridge is dead."

Really? My fridge is but 2 1/2 years old.
The warranty expired in May.

Trevor went to the place we bought it to lay the smackdown on the dealer. He brought Simon for a little extra muscle. The dealer is getting us new guts for the fridge. We should get a loaner fridge... maybe Monday. Until then, it's lukewarm carrots, chunky milk and meat that I'm afraid of. Good thing we'll be dining out for the next 2 nights.

A new slant on Dylan Thomas

One of my favorite poems to teach (when the powers that be force me... French Immersion me... to teach English???? - oh foolish, foolish powers) is Dylan Thomas' "Do not go gentle into that good night". I think it's a fabulous poem.
Lately, I've been thinking that a few of the lines are Simon's new anti-sleep mantra:
"Rage, rage against the dying of the light"
"Do not go gentle into that good night"

The kid is currently down for the count. I'm not sure how long my "break" will last. Enough time to fold laundry? put away groceries? finish this blog?

My chubby dictator has a snooze button?

This morning, after a silly nights of nursing and fussing, Simon woke up at 6:30 am. I bounced him back to sleep (this involved 300 squats on my part... forget about a gym membership when mothering Simon). At 7:50 am, I heard some fussing and thought that this was a much more acceptable time to wake up. I picked up my baby only to have him fall back to sleep. So, I went back to bed. This happened again at 8 am, 8:10 am and finally at 8:20 am. Yeesh! I've never been a big fan of the snooze button... when you're up, you're up. Apparently, my sometimes benevolent, sometimes malevolent chubby dictator has other plans.

Back on track

Last night, Simon slept for 6 hours, ate and then slept for 4 more.
Simon didn't yell at me in the car today when we went to WalMart. (Thanks to a handy DVD player and Baby Einstein, Simon was calm, collected and cool the whole 7 minute trip. If you'd have asked me 4 months ago if I'd let my 3 1/2 month old watch a DVD in the car, I would have poo-pooed all over that idea. Now... I embrace whatever keeps my child from having a meltdown. I choose sanity; please don't judge.)
Simon is napping right now IN HIS CRIB. (He used to do just fine in his crib. Then, he let it be known that, unless he was in his swing, he wouldn't stay asleep. The fact that he is back in the crib has me dancing in my seat as I type.)
I feel like myself again (sleeping through the night - for the most part sure has a way of making a girl feel good again).
Thanks for all your prayers and messages of encouragement.

P.S. - To the 12 individuals in WalMart today who asked me variations of "Oh... poor thing, what's wrong with his legs? Did he break them?", I wish I'd had the guts to reply, "Yes, he did break them. That's what happens when you try to walk and you're only 3 1/2 months." Snoopy strangers...

The picture above is of Simon turning the pages of his book. He's pretty cute about it.

On the mend...

After some Google research, I've discovered that most post-op infants revert back to newborn behaviours. That explains my very needy little man. I remember being awake with him a lot as a newborn... he grew out of that eventually and developed his own little routine. Now that his little world's been rocked, he's up a lot at night and feeding on demand. I feel a bit better knowing that.
Simon and I have started "assisted naps". I let him nap on his own until he wakes up 1/2 hr later and then I cuddle and nurse him back to another 1 hour and 1/2 of dreamland.

Undaunted by the casts, Simon is still quite determined to roll.

Sleepless in Simonville...

Simon's not the a great sleeper on his best days. We had a nice little routine where he would get up every 3-6 hours at night and have one long AM nap, two shorter PM naps and a short evening nap. Then, we had surgery. Nights have taken on a nightmarish quality with the of sound of wailing from an inconsolable baby. When we're lucky, we can get him to relax and drop back to a deeper sleep with lullabyes, shushing, nursing, lots of rocking and bouncing and the sound of the shower (yes... it's weird but, it works). Simon refuses to sleep in his crib. He's spending his nights in his swing.
Days are now a constant fight to get my little one to have good, deep naps. Today, he was the king of the cat nap with no real deep, healing rest.
Was it the morphine? Is it the casts? Is he such a touchy guy that the change of routine threw him for that much of a loop? Is he in pain? Does the Baby Tylenol bother him? Will he be like this again when he has his hand surgery? Will I ever have a normal sleep ever again?
I've read a lot about baby sleep. I have yet to come across helpful information for a baby who has just had surgery. I have yet to find success with the "put him in the crib and pat him to sleep" method. I refuse to let him cry it out. He just gets hysterical. I'm getting to be at my wit's end.
He's scary. I feel terrible for him. In the dead of night, I feel like I've failed him because I can't get him to sleep peacefully. Isn't that my job? If I can't get my baby to go to sleep, what's going to happen with bigger, more important things?
It's almost 9 pm. Trevor lulled the little man to sleep in his arms while watching the Riders play. How long will this last? When will this scary stage be a distant memory?

Wishing you all a good night and hoping one for myself.

Stable and Healing

Simon's surgery went well. Everything happened on time and as predicted. Simon's little legs have had their heel-cords lengthened (that's doctor speak for snipping the Achilles' tendon - it does grow back in infants... impossible for adults). Simon will have to wear this set of casts for 3 weeks, and then another set for 2 weeks after that. We're hopeful that this will correct Simon's clubfeet.

Simon's fast asleep in his swing right now. He whimpers and moans and we dole out the Baby Tylenol every 4 hours. He had morphine this morning and that seemed to take the edge off his pain. During his brief moments of lucidity, he's pretty groggy. He cries a lot when he's awake.

If you're praying, pray that he continues to sleep. Sleep numbs the pain and will help him heal. Pray also that he'll eat better. With an IV and the morphine, his appetite's been pretty off.

We're thankful that this is done and that Simon is on the road to recovery.

Tough Love

Simon has clubfeet,
100 years ago, Simon would have grown up lame.
In today's world, with casting and minor surgery, Simon
will be able to develop and walk sans problem.

Tomorrow, Simon will have his minor surgery.
It is a simple heel-cord snip on both legs.

I know it's just minor surgery and I know
it's necessary; I just don't
know how to explain all the
pain to my 3 month old.

Honestly, I'm scared.

If you get a chance and have the time, please
pray for my little boy.
We go to the hospital at 6:45 AM.
His surgery is at 8 AM.

Chubster

Glorious, glorious chub!
Bring on the dimples and the fat rings
Give me more baby belly and a few more rolls.
Keep it up, my boy!

Mennonites Invade LutherLand

We went to a Family Gathering this past weekend. The location: LutherLand... seriously! Nothing like a pile of Mennos hanging out at LutherLand. :)
It was a swell weekend. It was our first time taking Simon anywhere overnight. Despite the crazy heat and having to adapt to a playpen, Simon did just dandy. He was a little trooper who got all his naps in and he played hard with all the adults who were smitten by him. Trevor and I were pretty impressed.
A few hours after getting back from LutherLand, Shiya and Marshall came to stay. They're leaving for their Family Gathering this afternoon. The poor souls were subjected to a teething baby but, they managed to find time to read and relax. It was nice to have extra hands around the house.
Last night, we hosted Shiya and Marshall as well as two other couples and their kids for supper. We had 6 boys under 4 in our teeny-tiny living room. We made the Dads take the bigger boys to the park while we ladies stayed back with the babies. That helped. Now, I know we need a play room before Simon gets to the excited, screaming play stage. Yikes! Little boys are loud!
I plan on a long nap today. I hope Simon will let me...

Mirror, mirror

I went to the doctor's a few days ago thinking I may have a breast infection. It turns out, I'm just fine except I may have shingles. (???!!!!???? What the heck? Anyways, nothing has developed so far. Here's hoping I just have mystery aches totally non related to chickens and their pox.) For kicks and giggles, I stood on the scale. My eyes just about fell out of my head. I sat down and then, in disbelief, went back on the scale. I weigh within 4 lbs of my original pre-pregnancy weight. Simon will be three months next week. I'm stunned. Believe me, the mirror tells another story. I have new, ample places that weren't so ample before. I have come to realize that a "flat" tummy is a long way off. Now that Simon likes walks (knock on wood), I'll to work on tone. That way, I'll be in shape to start this whole crazy process again!

One man's junk...

Would you buy a partly used candle in a colourful, although chipped, candle holder?
What if it was just $0.25?
How about a fabulous brown sofa set from the mid 1980s?

Can you believe that we sold almost $300 worth of junk in just 2 days?
My Mom sold ~$150 worth of junk as well.

Thanks for buying my crappy items so I didn't need to fill up
my dumpster and add to the volume of the city dump.
Enjoy that nasty old vacuum (dirt included).

1095 days

Happy anniversary, Trevor!

Yesterday, my beautiful man and I celebrated 3 wonderful years together.

I can't imagine my life without him.

a whole new world

Poor Simon. He is now castless for the next 3 weeks. This gives us (his parents) lots to rejoice about. No more casts clicking our kid awake. No more cast squeezes. No more sponge baths. Our kid has legs.
Unfortunately, Simon's not sure about his legs. Actually, I think Simon's a little afraid of his castless legs. His little world's been rocked. After a lifetime of not bending his knees, moving his feet and having his feet tickled, this is a big shock for him.
Today, he barely napped. Baby Tylenol didn't do it's job last night.
As thrilled as we are to have our free boy, we're sad for him. We're sad that his "normal" is plaster casts on his little legs.
Simon's legs are free because they are now at 80% corrected - they're are amazing compared to what they were when he was born. He's scheduled for surgery during the first week of August and will be in casts again until the fall. We're excited to see an end to this journey.

On a side note, this kid was AMAZING for his immunization. He screamed for each needle and then, he was done. He fell asleep on the way home and had no reaction other then sleeping a solid six hours that night. I'll take shots over casts any day!

(Special thanks to my Mom who came over to play with my restless boy so I could nap today... definitely a sanity saver!)

Patent Pending

Red light = sad Simon

"Every baby falls asleep in the car."
"My baby loved car rides."
"When my daughter was upset, we'd just stick her in the car and drive around until she calmed down."

These are things I was told before Simon was born. I believed them. I believed that every baby loves the car. Poor Simon is not every baby. He HATES car rides. He screams and screams and screams in the car. Sometimes, he screams himself to sleep. Most times, he just drives us batty and then falls asleep as soon as we take him out of the car.

Yesterday, I drove home from my parents farm. Simon was asleep for the first half of the trip but, woke up as soon as we hit the first red light in town. Of course, with my luck, we managed to hit every single red light (one twice thanks to a traffic back-up due to construction). With every stop light, the howls wind up and get louder. He almost gets a grip on things and then we hit another red light. Yeesh... my kid has lungs.

I've decided that I should invent some sort of device to project Simon's screaming into traffic. It can act as a type of siren. Everyone who hears it will realize that I am driving an irrational, inconsolable infant and will get out of my way. This "siren" will give me the power to speed (a revved up engine helps calm the kid) and run red lights without punishment. Actually, everyone will feel better because then, I am taking the siren noise away from them.

I need to figure out how to get some flashing lights to go with my Simon Siren. I'll let you know when these go on the market... until then, I'll just wear the earplugs my mom gave me and pop some extra Tylenol.

Tag

Amanda tagged me awhile ago. The point of the tag is to state 5 reasons why I like being a mom. I'm a little new at the job but, this is what I like.

1. Simon's snuggles. This kid is a born cuddler. There's nothing sweeter then holding a baby who really wants to be held and cuddled.
2. Simon's smiles. He started smiling at exactly 1 month. These smiles are what get me through the fussy moments. (His adorable coos and squeaks rival the smiles.)
3. Mat leave - really, how wonderful is this? Not all countries support families this way. I'm very, very thankful that I get to spend a year dedicated to my little one!
4. Laying on a denim quilt on the grass in the backyard staring at the leaves and clouds in a blue, blue sky because that's one of my little guy's favorite things to do.
5. Nap time - I'm way more productive then I've ever been.

I tag: A Mommy Going Crazy, Laurie and Colleen

Out and about

We've been busy. It's nice to be busy.
Trevor had Canada Day off. We celebrated by taking a screaming Simon for a stroller ride in the park. He promptly drifted off to sleep when we initiated Plan B (Trevor carrying him in Baby Bjorn and me pushing the empty stroller). We listened to fireworks from our house that night as our baby slept soundly through them. Maybe he'll be up for watching them with us next year.
Simon got his 8th pair of casts this week. He was allowed a 3 day stretch (literally) before. He wasn't overly impressed when he got his new pair. This is his last pair before his surgery (heel cord snip on both feet at the end of the month). Then, he'll have ~5 more weeks of casts as he heals and hopefully, all will be well with his little legs. It's good to have a time line. I'm nervous about the surgery but realize that it's for the best.
Simon and I hosted a baby shower for beautiful Baby Beth on Thursday. Actually, I really just did all the the talking and inviting while my Mom did the bulk of the work. It was fun to get out and show off my boy.
Uncle Traveling Jared came home from Saudi Arabia yesterday. We met him at the airport and then enjoyed a good family meal together. It's good to have him home.
All in all, it was a pretty great week. Trevor only had to work 3 days and we LOVED having him home. (He arranged for a fabulous Sunday nap for me - I feel like a whole new person). We'll be a little sad to see him go back to work tomorrow.

date to the prom

a culmination and a beginning

One of my favorite things about teaching high school is grad. There's the excitement of the day, the beautiful gowns, the handsome tuxes and the drama of who's going with who and how you're getting there. That's a lot of fun and I've always enjoyed the build up with grade 12s during the second semester.

More importantly is what grad symbolizes. Grad is the culmination of 13 years of public education. For 13 years, these students have followed (for the most part) a very predictable, daily routine. For 13 years, these students have been equipped with as much knowledge we, as teachers, can give them. For 13 years, these students have been preparing for their future, this is a very ambiguous and abstract concept for most of them. Grad is a culmination of these 13 years.

Grad is also a starting point. Now, that ambiguous, abstract future is upon them. No longer can they procrastinate growing up... it has to happen. It's a scary and exciting time for them.

As a teacher, I always feel like a momma bird shooing her young out of a nest. I trust that they've been well taught and I'm anxious to see them fly.

Congratulations grads of 2009!

Clothology

The laundry's going again.
I have Simon in cloth diapers.
I love them.
There is no garbage.
There are no chemicals.
There is no false dryness.
I don't have to worry about running out of diapers.
I don't ever have to add diapers to my grocery list.
(This means we're saving TONS of money.)
Simon has a really cute, big cloth diaper bum.
Simon loves being changed.
Simon hasn't had any bad diaper rash yet.
I'm happy to be doing the laundry again.

unkinked

I was noticing that Simon was holding his head only to the left. He would fuss if we put him down with his head to his right and promptly turn it to the left to sleep. Another mom mentioned that her son did this until she took him to a chiropractor. After a little internet research, I read that some babies suffer spinal trauma during the birthing process. Simon wiggled his way out sunny-side-up and ear first. That could have been a little painful for him.
I took him to a lovely chiropractor who let me hold Simon for half the treatment and she held him for the other half. 10 minutes later, I walked out with a new kid. He turns his face to the right and fusses less. Maybe the little guy just needed to be unkinked.

A puzzling question

Every time I take Simon out somewhere where there are a lot of people, I'm always asked the same puzzling question: "Is he a good baby?"
I'm not really sure what, exactly, is being asked? Are they wondering if he cries a lot? Simon does cry a lot. He's 6 weeks old. Crying is the only way he can communicate with us. I think he's a bit of a fussy guy but, maybe he's just very vocal. Who knows?
Are they wondering if he sleeps through the night? I think this is a pretty big expectation for a little man who's stomach is maybe the size of an Oreo cookie. At first, he got me up three times a night, then two. Last night, I only had to get up with him once. I'm pretty impressed.
What are people looking for when they use the qualifier "good"? What mother would ever say, "No, I have a very bad baby."?
Really... this is a puzzling question. If you have any idea what this means, let me know.

The picture is of a smiling Simon during tummy time. He's a lot more interactive now and his little smiles make my day.

Happy Birthday - Part II

Happy B-day to the love of my life!
Trevor turns 29 today!!!

Welcome Baby Elizabeth McKenzie.
Born June 7th, 2009.
6 lbs 9 oz and looking just
like her Mama!
(Yeah - I'm an Auntie!)

Happy Birthday!

Goodness, I'm 30.
How did that happen?

A shift in priorities

Today, I didn't make my bed until 3:30.
Instead, I nursed and cuddled my boy.
Today, I didn't do any yardwork or housework or laundry.
Instead, I walked to a friend's house, had lunch and played with her sweet toddler
Today, I did not fuss about thank-you cards (too much) or sort through Simon's "loot".
Instead, I went to a mom's group and showed off my baby.

Today, I shifted my priorities.
My little guy was very content and is now very tuckered out.
Lesson learned: Mommy and Simon need to get out more; it's good for both of us!

a downpour...

Approximately 3 years ago, I had my church bridal shower and I was overwhelmed and inundated with amazing gifts. I'm still rolling in tea towels and serving dishes.

For the past 2 Sundays, Simon has been showered in onesies, cute outfits, blankets, toys and other baby paraphernalia. My sister-in-law hosted a really fun Eco-shower last weekend where guests were encouraged to think "green" while shopping for Simon. Yesterday, we had our church shower and, once again, I was blown away.

It's pretty awesome to be part of a community that really wants to tangibly support big changes in my life. The girls from my Care Group worked so hard to prepare food and plan games. It was so nice to have a room full of ladies showing up as a way of telling me that they support me and that they are interested in Simon's life. I'm very grateful.

Now... I have a pile of laundry to do. :)

One Month

Simon is one month old today.
Our little dictator weighs ~8lbs 14 oz.
He's shifting between eating every 3 hours to every 4 hours.
He makes great eye contact and could win staring contests.
He likes to sleep with his hands under his chin.
He hates it when I try to burp him because it interrupts his feed.
He hates being put down or left alone.
He likes to make us work for our sleep at night.
He naps like a trooper during the day.

I can't believe that he's already 1 month.
It's been one crazy blur!

Casting Party

Simon has casts to correct his club feet. We're not sure how long he'll have them. It all depends on how his feet take to them. Every Monday night, Trevor and I take off Simon's casts. I nurse Simon and hold him tight while Trevor takes tin snips and nursing scissors to his casts. The above photo shows the nice equipment he gets to use. The first time we took them off, it was really stressful. Now, we've got the process figured out, we're much better at it... and faster.

Every Tuesday, I get to go to the hospital where a doctor manipulates Simon's feet and casts them for the week. We enter the waiting room and everyone "ooohs and aaaahhs" about my cute little baby. Then, we go into the casting room. Simon screams bloody murder through most of the procedure making me look like a mean mommy to most of the waiting room (they avert their eyes when I go back out).

Did you know that, in the U.K., doctors are trying to make it illegal for parents to abort babies who have clubfeet? There's been an increase in abortions for babies with this very correctable defect there? It seems these parents don't want the "inconvinience" and would rather try again for "perfection". This makes me pretty angry and then, very sad. Even though the whole casting process is a pain... it is a solution. My sweet Simon will walk and run with the best of them. For this, I would do anything!

Cat on a Hot Tin Roof

Yesterday, Trevor did sound for church. That meant I was on my own to get myself and Simon ready. We had 2 hours. I was feeling pretty confident... then I let my cat out.

Fergus loves his outside time. I hate denying it from him. Yesterday, he climbed our big maple and jumped onto the roof of our house. He's never done that before. It's a pretty big leap for him.

When I went outside to call him in, he was nowhere to be found. I could hear his plaintive mewling from my roof. When I looked up, I could see my panicked cat panting on my roof.

What the heck could I do to get him down? I had Simon in my arms and curlers in my hair. Fortunately, I had managed to get my cute little spring skirt on. Unfortunately, climbing onto my roof on a windy spring day in a skirt is not practical.

I put Simon in his swing. I got a chair from the kitchen table to stand on while on our front steps. Nothing. Fergus would come and then panic and run to the other side of the house. Simon started to wail.

There I was, on my front steps, in a spring skirt, babe in arms. I was a cartoon character waiting for a firetruck to show up. A nice family stopped and tried to help. Fergus was afraid of the husband and wouldn't come to him. The wife held Simon while I tried again to no avail.

Finally, I called to let Trevor know I'd be late. I put Simon down again and tried one last time.
Fergus had given up. He came to me and stepped down into my arms.

Now, he wonders why I don't really want to let him outside.

(I made it on time to church... laughing all the way).

Important update in the world of Jill:


I'm wearing my old jeans.


(Yes, I am proud of myself and feeling a little smug!)

Miss Grace

My first day alone was on Tuesday.
I tripped over the cat and landed hard on my knees. Fortunately, this was during the 5 minutes Simon would sit in his vibrating chair. Fergus was a little miffed but, he survived.
We had 2 Dr's appts. We waited for 3 hours in the Ambulatory Care waiting room so Simon could get his third set of casts. Then, we boogied down to the south end to meet up with Simon's pediatrician. Needless to say, we had to nurse on the fly making my boy (who likes to take his time) surly. I whacked my head on the roof of the car lifting Simon's carrier out of the car. Nothing like a whopping headache, a screaming baby and another doctor's waiting room to make my day fabulous.
Seriously, Day #1 made me wish that both Trevor and I could have parental leave all year together. I have no idea how single mothers do it! Kudos to them.
Day #2 was better. Simon was alert and awake most of the day but, I did manage to get my clothes on, breakfast/lunch eaten and teeth brushed by noon! Yeah! We also had some fabulous company in the afternoon that reminded me that Simon really won't be a little baby for long.
Today, my M-I-L came for a Simon-fix allowing me time to do my hair, get supper ready and put clothes on before 10. Amazing! Then, she convinced my little alert baby to sleep! Success! Thank-you, Grand-ma!
We're heading out to my school today to introduce Simon to my students and staff. I'm really looking forward to getting out. I hope this little Magoo likes getting out too!

Manly Men

In the middle of the night, it dawned on me that I was surrounded by men.
I could hear Trevor's heavy breathing as he enjoyed blissful sleep.
I could smell little Simon's farts and listen to his burps as he gulped away at his food.
I could hear Fergus stalking a toy mouse... always the intrepid hunter.
I am the only girl in this place.

I guess that makes me the princess. I'll expect royal treatment from my men. :)

Gettin' my wiggles on

Simon loves his Mommy. Simon loves to be held by his Mommy. Simon loves to be bounced up and down and up and down by his Mommy as she paces the house doing her "wiggle walk".
Mommy tries really hard to sing lullabies but mostly, she hums Christmas carols and church choruses. Trevor spends large amounts of time giggling at her (he makes up for this by doing his own stellar "wiggle walk").

We bought a swing and a friend lent us her vibrating chair. Simon can get ~ 5 minutes of questionsable entertainment from those and then, it's back to Mommy or Daddy. I'm going to have to learn to do things one-handed for a while. I plan on losing all my pregnancy weight by strictly wiggling. :)

Bring on the Scholarships

When we went for Simon's first ultrasound back in December, we were so excited to see our little baby. We expected everything to be ticky-boo and all I could think about was getting good pictures to put on my fridge. Things started out okay and then the ultrasound tech left and brought a colleague in. After a lot of whispers and conversations in the hall, both techs called in a doctor to come and see our baby. Trevor and I are pretty positive people but, it was starting to dawn on us that this was not the ordinary ultrasound experience. I had to go back 2 more times that week before the doctor could assess what was going on with Simon.

First, Simon has club feet. This is a pretty common birth defect and is easily correctable. Simon is currently wearing his first set of casts. Every week, we go a see a doctor who re-casts Simon's legs. Eventually, his feet will be just fine. The casts are a bit of a pain but, we're really glad that we were able to get them on him so soon. This won't affect his life much beyond the weeks to months that he has to be in the casts.

Second, Simon has a deformed left hand. While in utero, Simon had something called Amniotic Band Syndrome. This affects 1-2% of babies. It's a fluke of nature. The fibrous bands that fuse together to create the aminiotic sac didn't line up quite right. This left some bands free. Their whole job is to adhere to whatever is there. Unfortunately, this was Simon's left hand. This means that Simon is missing his pinkie finger (a band wrapped around it and slowly amputated it) and wrapped around his other fingers stunting them.

At first, we were really sad and upset for Simon. I still feel incredibly guilty that this all happened to him while he was inside of me. It is a fluke of nature and there was nothing that I did that caused it and nothing I could have done to prevent it. However, it's an awful feeling to know that your baby's been hurt.

It took some time but, Trevor and I began to realize how fortunate Simon actually is. After doing a lot of research on Amniotic Band Syndrome, Simon is quite a little survivor. Some babies have much more serious complications due to the banding.

Now, it's really irrelevant to us. We know that Simon will be able to do what he wants. We have a great plastic surgeon who will give Simon as much mobility and "normalcy" with his hand. It will be considered a minor disability but, we don't expect it to "disable" our son in any way. He's already had his first surgery (yikes... surgery at 8 days old) and he's a tough little guy. We aren't looking for sympathy for us or for Simon. We're done being sad. We're ready to embrace the challenge that Simon's been given and we're prepared to see him wow us with his adaptability.

What We Learned in NICU...

NICU stands for Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.
It's a pretty intense place.
We were only there for 4 1/2 days. This, in the grand scheme of things, is nothing. We have friends whose baby was in for 79 days. We have a better sense of what they went through when they had him.
This is what we learned while Simon was in NICU.

1) Gowning up and scrubbing up before seeing your baby is hard.

2) There are rules to follow - just grandparents and parents are allowed in. (This was exceptionally hard on our siblings. They were only allowed to see Simon through a window... once he was clear of the oxygen. We felt really bad about this.)

3) Every baby in NICU has a story. There were so many helpless and hurting little peanuts. We watched some very little preemies roll in. We watched, from a distance, as their parents tried to connect with them in their little isolates. We were so fortunate that we were able to touch and cuddle Simon right away.

4) NICU nurses are amazing. I learned so much from them. They helped us bathe Simon for the first time. They helped me change his clothes (it was scary at times when he had all his monitors and tubes hooked up). They taught me to nurse. (I actually had some pretty intensive breast-feeding training from a NICU nurse who has some lactation consulting classes. It was painful... I came away bruised but, Simon sure learned to eat.)

5) It's okay to ask for help. I'm a fairly independant girl but, I learned that I definately couldn't do everything on my own in NICU. I had to ask for help for a lot of things. As humbling as this was, it was really good for me.

6) It's okay to cry in public. Post-partum is normally a teary time for women. Most women get to ball their eyes out at home. I got to ball my eyes out in my Mother/Baby room (just as my Mom's friend walked in - sheesh). I balled my eyes out on a rocking chair in NICU while holding Simon in front of all the other nurses and NICU parents. I balled my eyes out in the pumping room. Nothing like the whoosh, whoosh of the breast pump to back my spastic sobbing. Yep - the hospital has seen it's fair share of my tears.

7) There are too many demands on new parents from friends and aquaintances to "see the baby". It was hard enough that Aunties and Uncles couldn't see Simon. We had to explain to countless friends and aquaintances that no, they really shouldn't come up to the hospital to visit because, we'd rather just be in NICU with Simon. It was hard to make some of them understand that this was stressful for us and a visit from them wasn't really the solution we, or Simon needed. It's nice knowing that we are supported however, it was hard to explain that this wasn't the support we needed.

8) Support groups are grand. We met a few parents in NICU and it was nice to sit and rock and talk about our babies with them. We understood what each other was going through to some extent.

We were glad to leave NICU. I hope I never have to go back. However, I did learn a lot there.

The Birth Story - April 28th/09

On April 14th, my water broke... 2 weeks later, I went into labour. That's probably the most unique part of Simon's birth story.
Trevor and I were watching "How I Met Your Mother" when I started feeling contractions. I chalked it up to Braxton-Hicks and kept going about my day. They didn't let up. They started coming every 20 minutes. I took a shower thinking that this might ease them (or increase them). We went to bed. Trevor got to snooze a bit and my body slowly picked up contractions until I had to wake Trevor.
I did my little labour dances around the house and we packed for the hospital, fed Fergus and left. We drove through the snow storm and arrived at Emergency. We realized that we forgot my prenatal papers so, while I went to admitting, poor Trevor drove back to our house to pick up our papers. There was only one desk clerk and she was busy discussing some guy's gallbladder with him. Our prenatal teacher said that labouring women shouldn't wait but, this lady didn't notice me at all. Fortunately, another nurse came by and looked after me right away. She had an orderly walk me up to Labour/Delivery. I need to emphasize that I walked and I didn't let them wheel me up. I'm pretty proud of that.
When we arrived at Labour/Delivery, the nurse did the meanest thing to me. She made me lay on my back and she did fetal monitoring on Simon. Honestly, laying on my back was torture. All I wanted to do was walk or lean up against something. I had some serious back labour going on and laying on my back wasn't doing much for me. After about an hour of this, she assessed that I was 4 cm dialated and we got our labour room. (We were pretty pumped about this because we got the largest, nicest labour room in our hospital).
I continued labour for a while. I tried the laughing gas. I got really light-headed and nauseous. It wasn't working for me. By 4:30 am, I opted for an Epidural. Thank goodness! The anasthesiolgist was amazing and it wasn't as horrific as I'd expected. After the drugs kicked in, Trevor and I slept for about an hour and half. When the nurse checked again, I was dialated 8 cm. My Mom showed up around this time. It was nice to have her comfort and support me. It didn't take much longer until I was doing my practice pushing and starting labour.
I started pushing hard around 10 am. I think that, had Simon been presenting differently, he would've been out in record time. Unfortunately, Simon was facing sunny-side up (babies should be facing down) and he'd arched his little neck and wiggle his head so much that he was coming out with the largest diameter of his head. My doctor was a little frustrated with him. She let me push and push and push. His heart rate was picking up and we were both running "hot". After an hour and a half, she had to give me an episiotomy. After that little snip, I gave two more pushes and Simon was out. :)
That's the best feeling in the world, to have worked so hard and then have a baby as a reward.

We were able to name him and hug and kiss him and then he was whisked of to NICU. I'll post more on that later...

Sleepy and lovin' it

Simon had a rough first night home. His little casts (Simon was born with club feet) were
put on yesterday and he wasn't all the impressed with us or them.
He wanted us to hold him all night long.
Today, he had his first hand surgery (Simon was born a deformed hand - more on that later).
Trevor and I were pretty scared that he'd have a little fit.
He didn't.
He's doing well. He's reacting better then we thought he would.
Our son is a little trooper.
We predict a better night.
I'm sleepy but, this is the way things are supposed to be.

home again

40 weeks and 5 days in utero
2 weeks of pre-ruptured membranes
2 weeks of daily fetal monitoring (blech)
17 1/2 hours of labour (yeah - I'm pretty darn proud about how stellar I was)
7 lbs 3 oz. of Simon
50 cm long
4 1/2 days in Neonatal Intensive Care for Simon
too many doctors and nurses for Mommy to keep track of
6 long nights away from Trevor
2 little casts on my boy's legs
now, we're home
finally

all is well in my little world

:)