(For Jen) On Childcare

I love my baby-sitter. She's really the best. I can't say enough good about her. She goes over and above every day for my little people. Currently, she spends 9 hours a day with my kids. That's a crazy amount of time and influence over my sweeties. She teaches manners, good values and is a positive role model.

However, it's not her job to parent my kids. I expect that Trevor and I are still the major sources of moral education for our children. The buck still stops with us. Whatever she needs from us re: discipline, we have her back because we trust her.
When our kids, like normal kids, develop bad attitudes and unruly ways (ex: Claire has developed a new habit of hitting and yelling "hit, hit, hit" when she doesn't get her way or Simon falls on the floor screaming in mid-tantrum) then, it's our job to curtail these behaviors.

Our baby-sitter deals with these + 3 other kidlets and their wild toddler ways. She does an excellent job of managing it all.

But, what if? What if, for the 3 hours a day I spend with my kids, I didn't follow up with discipline? What if I'd rather avoid the big issues because it was just easier to have happy kids all the time? What if I felt guilty for working all day and bought my kids whatever they wanted all the time to appease my guilt? What if I blamed the other kids at the baby-sitter's for my kids behavior instead of taking the responsibility for dealing with it myself? What if I blamed my baby-sitter for the choices my kids make?

You see, I teach many kids whose parents did/are doing just that. In a world where it's becoming more and more necessary for both parents to work full-time, parents are delegating parenting responsibilities to people who only have a short-term interest in their kids' lives. Then, as their children enter a school system where common and healthy values are expected, kids are unsure how to navigate these rules or take responsibility for their actions. Kids make choices but, they need to learn that every decision can have both positive and negative outcomes. Kids need to own their choices and be prepared to then own the outcomes.

I can see how it's easy to slip into the "let's just keep you happy because I'm tired" mode. I have days where I do that. However, I have a group of 14 year-olds who are reminding me why I have to step up as parent. I love my kids too much to let them slide through life being appeased and not carefully taught and corrected.

Is this becoming the norm? Are we, as a culture, allowing the actual parenting of children to fall into the hands of our beloved nannies and babysitters? If this is the case, should we be paying them more and give them higher value in our society? How will this impact this upcoming generation of workers?

I'm just entering the full-time work world as a parent. I don't plan on staying here for long. I want part-time work so that I can teach, love and discipline my babies myself balanced with a healthy dose of the socialization that being baby-sat brings. I want to know what you think. What are your experiences with working while parenting?

Blogging FAIL

I have a 35 minute commute. It's longer if there's construction or, if drivers are being dumb. Usually, I come up with interesting blog posts on my way to or from work. Ideas like:
-teaching the Holocaust now that I'm a mother
-Halloween prep
-temper tantrums
-how hiring out childcare can lead to a more spoiled generation of kids
-students eating crayons (I know - ridiculous)
-Claire turning into a little girl
-Simon's frogs
-etc., etc., etc.,

Except, when I get home, I get the kids, I make supper (and play), we eat supper, we do dishes, we play, we get ready for bed, we put the kids to bed and we fall, exhausted on the couch. At that point in time, my brain is fried and there are no neurons all fired up and ready for some creative writing. If anything, I may have some energy to mark assignments, bake for daycare, do laundry or pack lunches. Life is full.

There's nothing wrong with this routine. It's a little busy but, many women all over the world do it. It's normal. However, it leaves little time for blogging. Thus, my apologies.

There will be the obligatory Halloween post but, I think the other thoughts swirling around my brain during my commute may be stuck in traffic for a little longer.

A little batty

We went to Pumpkin Hollow last weekend. It was warm and the sky was blue. The kids rode the cow train, jumped on the bouncer, met farm animals, climbed bales, got lost in the maze and checked out the pumpkins. It's hokey and I love it.

I went to 2 Children's Used Clothing sales in the past 2 weeks. I LOVE getting quality clothes for just a few dollars!

I'm presenting tomorrow at our Professional Development Day. Basically, I'm Book Talking with a colleague. I'll be introducing graphic novels to a lot of middle aged ladies. Should be fun! :)

We're hosting Thanksgiving for my family this year. I've never cooked a turkey before. Should be a good little adventure.

I finally tracked down a bat costume for Simon. Who would have thought that a bat would be such a hard costume to find in this city? Now, he never wants to take it off. We've negotiated a deal where he can't wear it to bed but, he can sleep with it beside him. Silly bat!